Closed Adoption - A Baby From Heaven

Closed Adoption

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Closed Adoption: Advantages

A closed adoption is just that, closed. You will not have the opportunity to choose the parents, you will know very little about them, and they in turn will know very little about you. After the adoption, contact will be minimal, possibly through another person, and there will be a lot of unanswered questions on both sides. Some young women do choose closed adoption, mostly as a means to pretend the whole experience never happened. Many women try to pretend nothing has happened, but they will need to talk about this painful experience. If they decline counseling and do not have any one close to them that knows what they have done, then they have closed the door to healing.

Closed Adoption: Advantages for Birth Parents

The closed adoption experience is different for each person; however here is a list of potential advantages that you might encounter with a closed adoption:

  • Sense of closure-Some birth mothers and birth families report that having a closed adoption provides a sense of closure and enables them to move on with life.
  • Privacy-Placing a child for adoption is an extremely sensitive and vulnerable choice. Having a closed adoption creates an opportunity for a stronger sense of privacy.
  • Reduced fear-Some birth mothers are concerned about explaining their choice and a closed adoption serves as a way to prevent them from a confrontation with a child placed for adoption.

Closed Adoption: Disadvantages

A closed adoption refers to an adoption process where there is no interaction between the birth mother and the prospective adoptive families. There is no identifying information provided to either the birth families or the adoptive families. Non-identifying information such as physical characteristics and medical history may be provided to both parties. When considering a closed adoption, there are a number of disadvantages that need to be thought through carefully for all parties involved.

Closed Adoption: Disadvantages for Birth Parents

The closed adoption experience is different for each person; however, here is a list of potential disadvantages that you may encounter with a closed adoption:

  • Dealing with Grief-Some birth mothers and birth families report that having a closed adoption makes the grieving process more difficult because there is a lack of information on the child’s well-being.
  • Dealing with Denial-Placing a child through a closed adoption may lead you to deny that the child was born and placed for adoption.
  • Dealing with Guilt-Since there is no opportunity to communicate with the child about why you placed him or her for adoption, it may be easier for feelings of guilt to develop.
  • Dealing with Abandonment-Some birth mothers report that they feel like they are abandoning their baby. Without the ability to communicate with the child, you may be more vulnerable to experience this type of emotion.
  • Dealing with lack of information-The absence of information about the child’s well-being combined with denial or guilt may make you more susceptible to depression.

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